Strange how making a decision can change things around you. A few days ago I made a decision to alter how I was doing, what I was doing, out of necessity. And basically, it all had to do with rearranging my priorities. I allowed one activity to override the equally important needs of another. Not always, but definitely too often. And after having made that decision, I started to notice things.
I felt better inside because I was not ignoring what I too frequently had allowed myself to previously ignore. The “battle” for position of attention had been decided on and those little extras that mean so much to those that we love, took on a new peace about them. A lot of the grudgingly aspects of being interrupted while I was focused, seemed to drop to the wayside because the priorities had been reset. Once the urgency had shifted, and been complied with, new opportunities to do both seemed to present themselves and I did not feel like I had abandoned one, to attend to the other.
I have a tendency to focus on one thing, to the exclusion of another, and that is not always good. Actually it’s probably never good. Sometimes it is not what we do or do not do, but how we do those things for others (the mindset that is in play) that are indeed more important and really matter, and the attitude in which they are done. It’s subtle but it’s different, because the attention has been shifted. I still do a lot of the things for others that I did before but the heart action behind what is being done has shifted. Kind of like one of those Mary and Martha things we read about in the New Testament.
I’m still working through this so this isn’t a done deal. But once the decision was made, things started to fall into place better than what they previously had been. There is ample time to do both but at different levels where one does not suffer because of the other. Self imposed levels of output have diminished on one side and risen up on another that was neglected. A better balance has materialized and I am at peace with it. Imperatives have been adjusted and I am surprised at the “opportunities” that appear, to focus on both, even with a priority set for one over another.
I don’t need to cover every thing that feeds into my focus. Some of it can wait and some will just drop to the way side but the important thing is the focus of my heart, to the Lord that I love and those that I care for. One can be there but not be there, and the most vital factor is to literally be there for all of the needs that need to be met, individually at that one time, in the specific need that needs to be met now. It is what your heart is focused on that matters, because it ultimately shows.
So this is a bit of an update, what I anticipated would happen, is not near as negative as I thought it would be and what I have gained is more than I thought I would gain. I woke up early this morning, refreshed and this will be posted before the day starts and this may be it and that is OK. If I get some “free” time where no one else is affected, that is a bonus but the day is theirs, not mine.
If you haven’t noticed by now, when I focus, I have a tendency to separate myself from all that is around me. That may be good for focusing purposes but it isn’t great for touching hearts around oneself. The lessons of Mary and Martha’s interaction with Jesus run deep.
I’m thinking this is a work in progress. Our God is amazing patient and I continue to be astonished at how little I truly understand.
Worthy is the Lamb! Blessings!